Look, if you’re starving in a post-apocalyptic wasteland and suddenly someone is like ‘oh I have tons of food and it just happens to be meat do you want some lol’ you CANNOT act surprised when it’s people. You simply CANNOT.
There are times and places where it is realistic to expect NOT to be served people. For example, in a pie shop underneath a barber shop. THEN you can be all 'OH GOD IT’S PEOPLE.’
If you are in a post-apocalyptic wasteland and are suddenly served a really good meat pie, you have to know it’s people. Do you see any cows? No, they all apocalypsed. It’s your neighbor.
If you’re served food in a post-apocalyptic wasteland, ask yourself these questions first:
Do I trust the person feeding me?
Is this meat fresh, and if so, have there been any livestock non-apocalypsed recently?
Have I seen Kevin within the past week?
Am I willing to commit the penultimate culinary taboo? (The ultimate culinary taboo is putting pineapple on pizza, a crime I regularly commit)
On this day of freedom, let’s talk about how bald eagles are queer!
It starts with a female eagle named Hope and a male named Valor I. The two settled down to neat together, however Valor I wasn’t a great dad. He did show up to incubate the eggs and basically never came around.
In comes another male, Valor II. He immediately did what a good eagle dad is supposed to, incubate, maintain the best, all that. This lead to him becoming Hope’s new mate.
Here’s where it gets interesting, Valor I didn’t seem to mind and actually stuck around! Eventually Hope started mating with both of them, and Valor I even learned to be a good dad!
Unfortunately in 2017 Hope was killed by intruding eagles, but! The two male’s actually stuck together and successfully raised their chicks!
Soon enough a new female named Starr came along and joined the two, and now she mates with both males every season!
This arrangement allows for the eagles to have a much more successful rate of raising chicks and fighting off other predators!
This particular story isn’t the only one! Bald eagles have been seen in multiple arrangements including two females and one male!
my brother started calling our cat “doobie brother” which he then lengthened to “dubious brother” and has since morphed into “brother dubious” like he’s some sort of fucked up little monk
seriously, don’t you want to be outside of this? don’t you want something to do with your life other than buy things or sit staring at things that beg you to buy more things?
aren’t you tired of sitting with a nameless, wordless frustration that you’re forced to try to verbalize only to be told you’re wrong no matter what you say?
